My boss must be getting nervous everytime I head to the cottage

In the last 7 months I have been:

a.) trapped overnight on a train by a downed electrical line, finally
reaching home at 6am, after 11 hours on a train, 1 hour on an open
platform at 2 am, and 2 hours queuing in freezing fog with 700 other
exhausted passengers for a taxi.
Made it into the office by midday, and pretty much sleep-walked through
the day.
The Good News - I was entitled to a 100% refund on the ticket!
The Bad News - the ticket only cost £12 to begin with.

b.) trapped for 24 hours by snow

c.) quarantined for a week after exposure to Swine Flu...

He must wonder what possible disaster (wind, flood, meteor strike or
mutiny) will strike our small but hardy community next.

Luckily, this week, the train is only running 33 minutes late - and the
refund on the delay is a slightly more proportionate £25.00